Electric Monkey Pants

Happy 4th of July; a time to celebrate the hard-won freedom that we no longer have by blowing up a shitload of fireworks.
I guess you could say that July 4th is a bittersweet day for me because I see our situation as being increasingly dire. We are under the thumb of a corrupt, tyrannical regime bent on world domination. Doesn’t exactly make me feel like celebrating. At least we still have the illusion of freedom, which is almost as good as the real thing. They let us continue to pretend to be free, but those days are numbered. In reality, our rights are increasingly being stripped away in favor of corporate interests and government power.

In these troubled times, it’s usually a good idea to try and get some perspective. In this case, let’s look to Britain and find out how they see us Americans:

Most Britons see America as a cruel, vulgar, arrogant society, riven by class and racism, crime-ridden, obsessed with money and led by an incompetent hypocrite.

Hmmm…. harshly worded, but I can’t really find fault with their point of view. But c’mon, it can’t really be that bad, can it?

More than two-thirds who offered an opinion said America is essentially an imperial power seeking world domination. And 81 per cent of those who took a view said President George W Bush hypocritically championed democracy as a cover for the pursuit of American self-interests.

…And these are our allies, folks. Can you imagine what more fair-minded people think?

The worst part is that they’re absolutely right. Bush is a fucking imperialist. Let’s not dance around the issue, here, okay? We’ll be invading Iran soon, so I don’t wanna hear any bullshit about “spreading democracy around the globe.” What a bunch of crap. The only thing we’re spreading is bullshit.

As a supposed democracy, we’re ultimately responsible for this mess because we (officially speaking) elected George Bush. In reality, that’s probably not the case, but it’s still bad news that he got any votes at all. It’s not very ironic that a man who wasn’t really elected is trying start an empire by pretending to spread democracy around the globe at gunpoint. It’s insanity; it’s ludicrous. It’s hypocrisy and outright deception.

Enjoy your 4th of July holiday. Enjoy your pretend-freedom — ya know, the kind that Bush and Cheney will soon take away in order to fight the terr’rists. Remember not to ask too many questions and be a good little sheep. Let’s all just pretend that the man with a 30% approval rating has a mandate and that he’s a not a lying piece of shit. The important thing is that we have the illusion of freedom, right? That way when Bush claims to spread that American freed0m-juice around the globe we actually believe that might be a good thing. But don’t question it, just watch the pretty fireworks.

Yayy… fireworks!…