Electric Monkey Pants

What a fearsome attack by the turkey!! Bush is surely finished now. Whole swarms of turkeys will track him wherever he goes. He messed up big. They first thing they tell you is “don’t piss off turkeys” in politics.

Okay, so I just found a picture and made that up. But Fox News makes up news all the time, so why can’t I? And really, don’t we all secretly wish that GW would be eaten alive by vicious swarms of malignantly insane turkeys prowling the earth searching for prey among the weak and stupid? I mean c’mon; everybody wishes that.

I think we’ve really learned a lot here today, children. Let’s all prey for the president’s immediate emasculation by turkeys in the hope that it will improve the sociopolitical milieu of our times. No doubt the current political paradigm is trending towards a cancerous expansion of power reminiscient of the archetypal slide into oligarchical totalitarianism so familiar in history that it calls for the only remedy that could be carried out forthwith, which is the president being fed to a ravenous squadron of rabid turkeys. Duh.

That’s a great picture, though. Bush would be a funny guy if he weren’t so sociopathic.