Electric Monkey Pants

This isn’t a problem at this low-ranked blog, but apparently it is for Dean Hunt, owner of DeanHunt.com and the blog that resides there. He has recently received vaguely threatening letters demanding that he give up his domain because:

You have to understand Dean that an online business should be higher in Google than a blog.

Don’t forget that Google is a business as well, they obviously make more money from other businesses than they do from blogs, so it is in their interest that I am higher than you for certain searches.

I have also contacted my lawyer about this issue, so you should expect a letter in the post very soon.

Let me be the 472nd to say, “AAAAAhahahahahahaaaaaaa!!! Haahahahaa! What a fucking moron!

Yes, Google is a business, but no, they don’t think businesses should be ranked higher than blogs. In fact, I bet they love it when that happens because then the business is compelled to start buying Google AdWords to bump up their ranking (well, really, they’re a “sponsored result” at that point).

This guy (who hasn’t been “outed” yet by Deano) is clearly a bully, and a particularly stupid one at that. Dean intends to stand strong and I support him all the way. People shouldn’t have to fear success on the internet, nor should bloggers be preyed upon by ruthlessly inept businessmen who seem to view the world only in terms of money and power. Fucking moron. I’ve got your back, Dean, and I know a lot of other bloggers do too.

You know, the internet really does have the power to change things for the better. We’re more connected now than ever before, and that gives power to “the little guy” who would’ve been steamrolled as little as 10 years ago. This inevitably must have a profound affect on our society, including the political realm. People are going to start demanding more transparency in government and business, and people are less likely to be cowed by bullying demands from the elite and those who dream of becoming the elite (like this fucktard).

Consequently, there are no more excuses. Is there something you don’t know that you wish you did? Have you encountered a challenge that is beyond your present abilities? Well, it’s time to step up to the plate. You’ve got an incredible resource like at your fingertips if you’re reading this, so don’t let limitations that would’ve previously been crippling get in your way! You now have the power to change your lot in life. Educate yourself. Better yourself. Rally your allies. Stand up to your enemies. Embrace the change that now must come. In previous centuries most of us would be nothing but peasants, living under the rule of some despotic king or lord. With no access to learning, no power to organize resistance or communicate with distant allies there was no way to fight against the yoke of oppression. But now, most of us are “free” and we have been given a great gift — a gift that our ancestors would have died for. The internet is the greatest gift to democracy in 200 years. Use it!

Update: Some folks on slashdot are saying that this is a hoax by Dean Hunt. That’s certainly a possibility. Let’s wait to see for sure that he’s telling the truth, but I think my rosy description of the potential of the internet is still valid. Just gotta remember to check our sources, verify info and don’t forget our assumptions. As for Dean, let’s hope he wouldn’t resort to something like this, but his blog is about SEO, which is about as respectable a profession as prostitution. Perhaps less so.